People underestimate the power of receiving blessings from people who matter to them on occasions that mark important moments in their lives. Asking members of your community to share their hopes and prayers and advice for your future can create wonderful moments, not only at your wedding ceremony but also in your marriage. People have good advice to give you. Now, in particular when we live at a distance from much of our community, capturing that advice whether on paper or video is the way we have to get advice. In our busy world, there are fewer moments in our kitchen over coffee or on the deck over a beer where the silence goes on long enough for a relative to ruminate about the pleasures and pitfalls of life-long relationship. So … here's your opportunity and a few ways to think about inviting your community's prayers and blessings.
- Ask the entire community to write their good wishes on a slip of paper. As people show up at the wedding, give them small slips of paper and a pen or pencil. Tell them there will be a collection toward the end of the ceremony (make sure to let them know that they will still be able to contribute through the reception!)
- Ask individuals or couples to invoke certain qualities you will need to succeed in marriage. (You can script this or not. If not scripted help them make it short!) These qualities should be ones they have – or ones ones they wished they had as they started their marriage. You should invite people who embody these qualities and people from what you are willing to learn!
- I've seen this most in Hispanic wedding ceremonies, but it [sa great idea for everyone. Marriage Godparents . Choose one or two couples (often one from each partner's community), which interviews you admire, to be life-long shepherds of your marriage.
People ask for advice and support when they have children. Raising children is certainly important. But your marriage is the vessel into which those children will come. Why would not you ask for support? People want you to succeed in marriage. Why not let them help you?
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