No one told you on your wedding day that your marriage would end up quite like this, did they? You likely envisioned a relationship filled with wonderful, loving and fulfilling moments. Of course you knew that there would be bumps along the way but overall you probably imagined that your wife would fawn over you forever the way she did the day she became your life partner. Real life has kicked in now and you’re feeling a bit neglected and emotionally bruised. You may feel that your wife puts everything and everyone else before you. Maybe you sense a growing distance between you two or perhaps what you’re feeling is all related to the fact that she takes you for granted. Whatever it is, it’s unpleasant and it’s making you resent her. That has to change. It’s not fair for either of you and you certainly can’t continue living in a marriage in which you feel unappreciated.
When a husband feels neglected by his wife, he’s bound to change his demeanor around her. It’s very difficult to remain close and loving to someone who doesn’t appreciate everything you bring to their life. You feel disconnected from your wife and that’s understandable given the circumstances. Unfortunately, unless you address what is going on by talking to your wife and changing the behavior patterns within your marriage, the growing distance that is there will only widen to the point that the relationship will be in jeopardy.
Talk to Your Wife About What is Happening Between You Two
You don’t need a reminder of how important communication is within your marriage, but this is certainly a time when it’s paramount to the future of your connection. Your wife may be oblivious to the fact that you feel that she’s not appreciating you the way you need. Just as you may have times in your life when your focus is on work or other things, that may be what is occurring with your wife right now. Calmly explain to her that you’re concerned that you both have been taking each other for granted. If you present it this way, she won’t feel as cornered or attacked and will be more open to listening. It’s important that you are direct when speaking with her about this and can offer suggestions for how you each can show the other how much you value them.
Show Your Wife More Appreciation
Sometimes in life we have to take the lead to get what we want. Such is the case with a marriage. If your wife undervalues everything you bring to the family and your home, you need to start complimenting her more on her own contributions. This is likely going to feel a bit foreign given the fact that you’re carrying a lot of difficult feelings about how she doesn’t fully appreciate you, but view it as a means to an end. By bringing the focus onto what your wife does to help you and your family, you’ll be subtly suggesting to her that thanking each other is important. This type of psychological pressure can help your wife have her own awakening in which she’ll realize that she hasn’t been giving you the appreciation and attention that you deserve. The key to making this work well is to be gentle, understated and consistent with your own compliments to her.
Small Gestures Can Make a World of Difference
There’s great value in doing small things each and every day that brighten your wife’s life. When a woman feels more cherished by her husband, she’s going to feel immeasurably closer to him on every level. This, in turn, will translate itself into her appreciating her man more and that’s exactly the goal that you’re chasing after.
By doing small things for your wife, you’ll be showing that you value her as not only a life partner, but a woman as well. Nothing extravagant needs to come into play. You can bring her a copy of her favorite magazine if you are at the store picking up a few grocery items. Maybe she has a coffee blend that she absolutely adores so pick up a cup of it and deliver it to her office one chilly morning. You may also just want to send her a text message now and again saying how lucky you feel to be loved by someone like her.
Anything like this, when done on a frequent basis, can literally transform how your wife views you. She’ll begin to see the treasure you are again and that will manifest itself in her actions and words. Not only will she come to appreciate you more, she’ll start going out of her way to make you see and feel how valuable you really are as her partner.